The State of The Challenge: Week Two
This week we finally got some drama. CT vs. Frank, CT vs. Trishelle, and CT vs. Anastasia. Sensing any theme? CT is playing a dangerous this season and it’s only making the show that much more interesting. The challenges themselves have been fairly interesting, and the elimination challenge of hanging upside down, sawing rope with a tiny saw, was one of the more fun eliminations yet. We are still not quite at the point where real alliances have been built, but hopefully after another men’s elimination we’ll be closer to the show we all signed up for.
The State of The Challengers
Front Runners
1. CT & Wes
Russ: Wes’ quitting week two is a total Wes move, but kudos to CT for sticking it out with Knight.
Michelle: If CT circled me like a shark wearing Clark Kent glasses, my heart would literally stop on the spot because I wouldn’t be able to handle living anymore. Diem is made of steel.
2. Johnny & Frank
Russ: Frank, you REALLY shouldn’t be trying to start shit with CT. He’s not from this earth bro. Like seriously? I had complete faith in this team until I saw his crazy switch flip.
Michelle: These are two despicable human beings, so I hate that they will most likely make it to the final.
3. Paula & Emily
Russ: I don’t want to talk about a team with Wonder Woman on it.
Michelle: 2 for 2 and I predict a possible 3 for 3 next week! #girlpower
4. Camila & Jemmye
Russ: Nothing special on these guys this week. I was impressed with Jemmye’s thrusting technique, during the saw exercise. But that was more from an odd attraction.
Tough Competitors
1.Leroy & Ty
Russ: Awesome move voting in Jasmine and Theresa. It was funny, and didn’t have any lasting implications. I’m still waiting for them to step up and get interesting, but hopefully it’ll happen soon.
2. Zach & Trey
Russ: Is this team joining the ranks of the front-runners this week? I think so. We know it’s a Zach heavy team, but all Trey has to do is coast.
Michelle: Trey, your contribution to the challenge was being carried through the course like the 85 pound doodle that you are. Please stop with the unearned confidence. It’s making us all uncomfortable.
3. Sarah & Trishelle
Russ: Trishelle shouldn’t be getting involved in other people’s arguments. Oh wait. She’s a dumb old ho bag. I’m also getting tired of Sarah thinking EVERYONE likes her, and she’s got the misfortune of being with Trishelle. No one likes you either. Ya fake!
Michelle: I’m with Magner, I’m just waiting for Aneesa to call Trishelle Trashelle. Sarah is just waiting for anything puzzle related so she can have her first orgasm since last season’s puzzle. I hope Jordan knows enough to bring his Sodoku book into the boudoir when they’re getting freaky.
4. Jasmine & Theresa
Russ: When are you guys going to be interesting?
Michelle: Theresa,you make a terrible ninja. If you’re not going to sleep with everyone again, then why are we watching?
Long Shots
1. Jordan & Marlon
Russ: Jordan, lets assess where you are right now. Your hooking up with dumbass Sarah? I thought you were better than that. Also, don’t say she’s someone you marry, cause that makes me want to throw up in my mouth.
Michelle: Jordan, you’re too good for Sarah! Marlon, you’re too good for everyone! Please make it to the end.
2. Robb & Derek
Russ: Robb, what good are all these new muscles if ya aint gonna use them. Derek, hook up with Preston, so you can be interesting.
Michelle: imagine if Derek was Derrick from Road Rules? Imagine if Robb wasn’t a lanky ginger? Maybe then people would remember that they’re competing on the men’s side.
3. Jonna & Nany
Russ: Nany did not have one line on the episode. Lets hope that changes this week.
Michelle: skating under the radar so far. Jonna isn’t even wearing tutus or pink hair streaks yet this season, so maybe she has become an actual adult human being?
4. Aneesa & Diem
Russ: Diem is playing that “i’m over him, oh wait no i’m not, oh wait yea I am” game hard. Just marry CT already!
Come On, Seriously?:
1. Preston & Knight
Russ: AWESOME TAKEDOWN KNIGHT! Remember that time Knight didn’t do anything this episode other than be adjacent to a fight? He’s positioning himself to be the middle-manager of the house. If Preston becomes a GBF, they might make it out of the cellar.
Michelle: Preston, Preston, Preston if you know what TJ Lavin hates in this life, it’s anything quit related. Also, quitting doesn’t help your whole “the worst player the game has ever seen” type reputation. So why?
2. Cooke & Naomi/Cara Maria
Russ: Cara Maria, you’re a big old loser and no one likes you. This girl must have had the worst time in Middle School/HS. I know I wouldn’t have been her friend.
Michelle: really awkward vibes for poor Cara Maria this week. But she’s a definite upgrade for Cooke, competition-wise. Although she is still threading Boggle letters into her dreads, so I can’t take her too seriously. Additional awkward vibes when Cooke peed on herself and possibly Cara Maria in front of everyone.
GOODBYE YOU LOSERS!
1. Anastasia & Jessica
Russ: Anastasia, you’re not ready for the big leagues. She used her age and her youth as reasons why CT should have known better. So you’re a model and spent a season on The Real World. Yea, you’re real innocent. Go home you lunatic.
Michelle: Anastasia, how many freakouts can you have in one elimination? about 37? K perfect. Jessica must have been so relieved to not be the biggest creep in the group for once.
Erin:
Check us out next week for our Week Three recap, and seriously, if you aren’t watching The Challenge, you don’t make sense at life. It’s 10pm EST on MTV. What the hell else could you be doing?